Sport Futility Vehicles
22Mar2006
I’m in Washington DC right now, enjoying the phenomenal political intellect and the soothing sub-tropical temperatures.
As they say in Scotland, aye right.
One of the main things I notice here is the number of SUVs on the roads, and the number advertised on TV. And the thing is, even after seeing several hundred adverts, I still don’t know if Built Ford Tough is a good thing or a bad thing. But I do know they like to sell trucks using rufty-tufty men in cowboy hats. That just shows you the demographic they are aiming at – and it’s not those shy, sensitive, cowherding types from Brokeback Mountain. Or then again, maybe it is?
Perhaps it’s just me, but SUVs are like the Homer Simpson of the vehicle world:
- They are much louder and more obnoxious than any of their colleagues
- They are grossly overweight
- They hang out at seedy bars with bums and low-lifes
- They guzzle juice like it’s going out of business
- They accidentally gun down fellow coalition forces in so-called ‘friendly fire‘ incidents
OK, so they may not all be accurate for SUVs, but maybe those points sum up why SUVs are so popular here – because they embody so many of the core American values.
But some things do still surprise me in the world of SUV’s:
- That companies think figures around the 30mpg mark are good
- That people buy Hummers – come on, it’s just a brick on wheels with a somewhat pervy name!
The other thing which I find rather interesting is the live green go yellow campaign from GM. And no, before you ask, it has nothing to do with urine. It is the programme to allow vehicles to run on corn-based E85 Ethanol. That also has me thinking:
- If E85 goes mainstream, won’t Iowa become an eco-warrior’s version of Texas? And will Kevin Costner make a crappy movie about it?
- Will all the staff at the E85 filling stations have to dress up like the Jolly Green Giant?
- If I am running low on E85 will I be able to pop into a grocery store and fill up on Niblets?
Only time will tell. Yes, and I know it’s corny.
But SUV´s means “stattus”…i have one my self…is not a big deal.
i´m on your side.
nice blog. (sorry about mi english,it sucks)
By the way…very nice photos…You´re good.
el mapache – good point. Smaller SUVs are now making their way into Bermuda for the same reason – status. Thanks for the comments.
Love it love it love
You have an outstanding blog, I have been perusing it for a while.
Originally from Iowa and round’about your age, I remember the Ethenol craze back in the 70s and your comment was SFF that I LMAO.
Love the photos, I am a VERY amateur photog and love what you do. I am in awe.
Love to you from Doo Dah
RoosterNoodleSoup and a soon-to-be-opened blog of my photos (not the cornball rantings from Rooster)
I just don’t get the suv thing. here in the PNW it seems like the bigger the better. Everyone has one and Everyone complains about how much they spend on gas.
I drive a hybrid getting an average of 55 mpg) and so when I tell them “suck it up, YOU picked the gas-guzzler” they tend to get mad.
i’m a small car person myself, but that’s because i’m spatially deficient. hummers are the utimate in tastelessnesslessness though. driving one will just make me wanna ram it into something just to alter the brick-shape!
30mpg is considered good cause all our cars are getting like 18mpg :p If I could just not put gas in my van for a year and save all that money and buy a mini machine I would sooo do it :p I hate buying gas
I like your sense of humor btw 
Not rude but very sarcastic 
funneh
SUVs also have the highest turn-over rate – and they are “gas chuggers.” However, SUVs are convenient for transporting lots of people (or things) and are sometimes necessary.
that photo of the wine glass is really nice!
doo dah – thanks for the great comments. I am still just an amateur photographer – and if I can do it anyone can…
mini driver – you disappoint me – you mean you don’t drive a mini?
frozen ananas – I have a small car too. Very small. So small it’s like the anti-SUV. But I still prefer my vespa…
kristiesue – you hate buying gas – so do I, and I think it is 4x more expensive in Bermuda than in the US.
author312 – gas chuggers is right. And can’t you use a minivan for transporting people/stuff? I know they are not very fashionable.
marie – thanks !
my friend, you’re right! you seem to be a rather witty person to me
Tom, fantastic blog! I spent quite some time reading over some of your posts, and loved them! I sent the link to some friends as well! Keep ‘em coming!
By the way, I also admire your photography. I’m sure you already know it’s great, and might think I’m patronizing you, but really, I just wanted to give you the external validation that artists tend to need, and express my liking for your work.
samgee – thanks for the comments.
Vin – I appreciate what you are saying. To be honest, I still see myself as a bit of an amateur at the whole blog/photography thing, after all it is just something I do outside of work. I know I still have lots to learn. But hey, learning is good.
I have a friend that was fascinated with the fact that you could buy a tank online. Military issue. He talked about driving it to Atlanta, which was cool. Then he started talking about a troop carrier and police stand-offs… well, that was not cool.