Paradise Found

Last week a man at the Bermuda LF Wade International airport ran amok in the immigration hall, damaging a Yamaha synthesizer and slightly denting a Fender guitar in the process. Two airport musicians were taken to hospital suffering from shock.

The man, an expatriate and Bermuda resident, had just returned from a ten day vacation in France. He went crazy after being forced to listen to the airport musicians playing “island music” for more than 45 minutes whilst waiting to be processed by Immigration.

According to onlookers, the man ran to the back of the hall where the musicians were located and proceeded to bludgeon their musical instruments with his rucksack. He was allegedly shouting “I can’t stand this any more”.

Airport security eventually restrained the man, whose name we cannot reveal due to ongoing legal proceedings. As he was dragged away, the remaining passengers cheered, obviously relieved to no longer have to listen to the music whilst queuing. One eyewitness commented “At least he was able to fast track the immigration process – I bet he’s out of jail before I clear customs.”